I’ve been spending a great deal of time lately thinking about how I am going to raise my child in the world as it is now. The world today is not the world I was raised in or raised for. In many ways the world is better with technological advancements and improvements in science and medicine. However in other ways the world seems to have stalled somewhere around the 1950s. The division, racism, bigotry and hatred found around me today are absolutely astounding.
My upbringing was different from what most people experience. I grew up in a small town with little to no ethnic diversity, but I grew up in the two hotels owned by my family. Also, without my knowing at the time, my father was raising me with aspirations toward me going into politics. Little did he know I would turn out to be the opposite of a politician. Several lessons stuck with me over the years.
First he taught me to know that the differences I saw in the people around me were nothing to be feared or made fun of but were to be learned from. I was encouraged to make friends who were considered different and to learn everything I could from them. As a result I learned how to connect with people in different ways and even more importantly to accept different cultures with a lack of judgement.
He also taught me that everyone had something to teach me and as such were deserving of respect. Regardless of how I might have seen my level of intelligence compared to theirs, they most likely had some kind of knowledge that I lacked. Through this I learned to understand the different kinds of intelligence (books versus practical versus people) and to learn everything I could from every person in my life.
The third lesson was diplomacy. This lesson was the hardest for me to learn as I believed at a young age that you should always speak the absolute truth. Unfortunately that left me being very blunt and often accidentally rude. Tact seemed like a kind lie and and that never came easy for me, but I was a natural peacemaker. I also had natural leadership skills and the gift of being able to speak with anyone on any level.
The question becomes: are these the three most important things to pass along to my son? After much thought I think I have determined the three lessons that I feel are most important.
1) Do the right thing even when it isn’t the popular choice
2) Speak the truth even when it’s hard
3) Be kind always.
I believe that in the current world if I can give my son these values, everything else will fall into place for him. These are the things that I think make someone a good person, and these are the things I aspire to myself .
